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Finding your values

Values are what guide us through our lives. One way of exploring what your values are is looking at what is most important to you.


Why do I need to know? In truth your values are there whether you know what they are or not.


Think about a time when you have had an uneasy feeling about a decision, or felt unhappy in a situation, like in a job. This is often down to a conflict with (or between) those things that are most important to us.

Knowing what drives us can really help us decipher life’s decisions.


Finding what is important to us can be both an interesting and a revealing journey. It asks us to dig deep and really look inwards and be completely honest with ourselves. Having recently attended an NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) in coaching webinar, I was blown away by the simplicity in the questions below so thought I'd share them with you as a wonderful place to start.



Grab yourself a pen and paper and gift yourself some time to complete these questions, for many it is not a quick journey and can be done all at once or over time, whichever feels right to you. Write your answers down, when reading them back see how the answers sit with you. Once you're done, return to the questions in turn and ask yourself the question “Anything else?” and just see what comes up.


❏ What is important to you in life?

❏ If you could have any career without constraints what would it be?

❏ What in the news causes you to be angry?

❏ What are you most proud of?

❏ When are you happiest?

❏ When are you the most ashamed?

❏ When you were at your happiest, what was present? What was missing?


Now that you are sure you have answered in full, begin to write a list of words and phrases that reflect you and what is important to you. It can help to imagine what your non negotiables are in given situations you have been in or can imagine yourself in. For some it might be “being environmentally friendly”, others prefer one-word values for example “respect” or “flexibility”, remember that it is personal to you.


Happy exploring!

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